By Bill O'Reilly for BillOReilly.com

Thursday, July 2, 2009

With Americans busy celebrating the 233rd birthday of the USA this week, freedom of speech comes to mind. We Americans are big on speaking freely, but the words we are using are quite another matter. In fact, we are becoming a nation of braying sheep, using the same words and phrases over and over again. Benjamin Franklin, a wordsmith if there ever was one, would have some issues with that.

Issues. That is a drastically overused word that is being used to avoid the proper word: "problems." "He has issues" sounds a lot better than "the guy is dramatically screwed-up." So, my friend, issues, not problems, is the new polite.

My friend. Is it just me, or does calling someone you just met "my friend" sound a bit condescending? Friendship takes time and commitment. I don't want somebody telling me I'm their friend. Alexander Hamilton, who could be a mean guy, would understand, and if he were still alive, he would give me a shout-out.

Shout-out. That cliché comes from the hip-hop world which has done more to ruin the English language than Paris Hilton. But the rappers have won this lexicon battle. Millions of Americans are now "shouting out" to their friends and neighbors. What's next? Dick Cheney giving a "shout-out" to Don Rumsfeld? Could happen and if it does, it will be Cheney's "bad."

My bad. This may be the worst cliché to hit the country since "groovy." Again, it comes from the hip-hop industry, where "they be chillin'" over using actual phrases like "that was my fault." Why say four words when you can say two, and rhyme at the same time? "My bad, I'm mad." Awesome.

Awesome. Why? Why not "splendid?" Or "excellent?" Or "super?" Sorry, we had "super" a few years ago and it almost drove me to learn Farsi. But, really, why awesome? Why is everybody saying that? And don't tell me "it is what it is."

I hate that. It is what it is. What does that mean? Should we go around and saying stuff like "hey, look at that alligator over there—it is what it is." I know that. I know what I'm seeing and hearing. I don't need someone to tell me "that refrigerator is what it is." That is sooooo not cool.

Sooooo. Pleeeeease. Stopppp.

And cool. When Brando said it in the 1950s, it sounded good. When Edd "Kookie" Byrnes said it on "77 Sunset Strip," it was in context. When President Obama says it, I want to turn in my passport. Grown-ups should not be saying "cool" unless they are wiling, like Brando, to ride big motorcycles very fast. Then it's okay. "You go, girl!"

Yikes. You go, girl! Another expression from the 'hood made popular by Oprah and other TV people. Now all the girls are going. But to where? Where are the ladies heading? I don't know.